Can women have it all?
You may have seen Anne-Marie's recent Article in the Atlantic which has already caused a lot of controversy and many people have blogged about it and commented in varying polarised ways.
Here is my take: This was written in response to a blog from a leading corporation
'It was easier when
the children were younger as I could hire au pairs who were able to take care
of the house and the children (I have been a single parent over the past 10
years so had no other support)
However, the past few
years have been what I call the ‘dark period’ ..the dreaded teenage years. You
can’t delegate this to anybody and nobody is qualified to ‘parent’ this phase
except the Mother or Father. I have dealt with 3 lots of GCSE’s 3 lots of A
levels and 3 lots of University (the latter still in progress) I have also had
to deal with them passing out at 3am in the morning in the streets, feinting in
Boots, bouts of self doubt about body image from living in the Surrey Stock
Broker belt. In other words 2 life threatening hospital visits, 2 drops outs
from College and Uni and weekly emotional ‘teenage girl’ metaphorical car
crashes! Oh yes and one real car crash where the car was written off at 3am in
the ice and snow.
It sounds awful and
sometimes it is. It tests my juggle not
struggle philosophy to the limit but the rewards are immense. I have
three accomplished, beautiful adult daughters and we are a close-knit family and I
have an outstanding and fulfilling career.
I wouldn’t give up
either aspects of my life. It is the whole that makes my life complete. I am
passionate about leadership development for women at mid to senior levels
because I can relate to them! It is about life, not leadership theory! They must
make choices with the end in mind. Not make ‘non-choices’ and drift to an
unsatisfactory end.
All of this is why I love what I do and one of the reasons that I suggest organisations make sure that women’s development is lead by somebody who a) has children and b) has a high pressure career as well
Two of my daughters
tweeted this week how proud they are of me and the third introduced me to her organisation a few weeks ago where her colleagues now say 'you must be so proud of your Mum'
Don't give up. Fall down seven times and get up eight!
As Stephen Covey taught me many years ago 'begin with the end in mind'
posted by Tracey Carr at
13:03
2 Comments:
Dear Tracey,
So true, thank you. Can't outsource the growing up of your children and yes, their most vulnerable phase is their teenage time. After I decided to no longer want to play the Corporate Game I am now setting up two companies of my own, working from home. Being available and present when my teenagers need me. My reward is immense.
I have spent over 20 years researching women's leadership as well as living the life. I echo the statement is that it is not about leadership, it is about building a LIFE. My research tells me that the most successful women set personal priorities -- and realize these priorities will change depending onthe current situation and the stage of their life/career. It is about desining what works for YOU.
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